I have been told as much, and the reactions of others have frequently confirmed it.
If it will satisfy your curiosity, I have mostly been described as frightening, brutish, or cold. One of my classmates told me that though she was not frightened of me, she found my features to be aggressive. Children have cried upon seeing me. Mothers clutch their children when I walk by.
[So, y'know. There's that.]
I understand that the prejudices of the Faerghan people do me no favors in this arena, but all instances of someone finding me frightening cannot be contributed entirely to just that.
I mean, sure - statistically there would probably be some number of people who would be intimidated by you anyway, just because you're a big guy who doesn't take it upon himself to look cheerful and approachable and crap. But that doesn't make you unattractive, either.
But also, genuinely, every example you've given here just... sounds to me like racism. Whether the speaker knew it or not. I mean, calling your appearance shit like "brutish" and "aggressive" is INCREDIBLY loaded; white people are constantly drawing associations like that between people of color's features and whatever garbage they want to associate with us. They decide we're lesser, and then they decide that our physical features are somehow *visual evidence* of that inferiority. Even if they're not acting out of deliberate malice, a Faerghan declaring your features unattractive or scary is never going to be a culturally neutral statement
Do not apologize. You have words for things that I do not, and I am grateful to learn them.
It is true that many spoke to me with deliberate malice. Some are merely ignorant, and while their ignorance is contemptible, I understand why they cling to their prejudices. The death of their king threw their lives into disarray. My people are easy culprits. The people of Faerghus wished to see a villain in our faces, and they have found what they sought.
However, even disregarding the prejudice against me in Faerghus, I do not possess features that are considered beautiful even outside of the Kingdom.
Fine facial features like His Highness’ or Sylvain’s are considered ideal. Hair color may be more of a personal preference than anything else, as I have heard admiration expressed both for Sylvain’s red hair and for Felix’s dark. Pale skin, of course.
Height is also attractive, in particular to Faerghans, though only until you start striking your head off of door frames.
My features are too coarse and my body built on too large of a scale to be generally attractive.
Right. That sounds very similar to the mainstream beauty standards in America, where I'm from - which came in turn from Europe, a continent that colonized America, and, from what I've gathered seems pretty similar to Fodlan.
There's an issue we talk about in my world involving "Eurocentric" beauty standards - ideas of what is attractive or appealing that are based on European/white features and cultural standards, and treat those standards as the default, or "normal" idea of what is attractive.
All this to say, I suspect Fodlan has much the same problem. Even outside of Faerghus, outside of the issue of more overt forms of racism, most people there will have learned a very specific standard for what is "attractive". They may consider features "coarse" that people outside Fodlan - and a handful of those within the continent whose standards aren't quite so steeped in the cultural hegemony - would see as sturdy and well-defined.
I suppose it is reasonable to assume that I may not be viewed so unfavorably among my own people, though I cannot say that I have asked. When I was with them, I was more concerned with healing from my injuries enough to return to His Highness than with something so superficial.
It is still strange, though, to think that my features are not so unpleasant as I have been led to believe. It is also difficult to argue with what has been posted openly in a public forum. The praise is effusive.
[Definitely not just being kind and trying to console him that his face really isn't that scary. Actual praise as though he should have been able to look into a mirror all this time and know that the face looking back at him is somehow... handsome?]
Though if what you have said is true, is it not strange that Lorenz and His Highness share that opinion? They would have both been raised to view faces like mine as unattractive, His Highness in particular.
Yeah, that's pretty fair. Not exactly the first thing that'd be on your mind.
Oh, yeah, it's bound to take some getting used to when you're new to being told that - but you're right, the praise *is* effusive, and it *should* be difficult to argue with, because it's true. :)
Depends. It could be called "strange" in the sense of being unusual, sure - but there's always a degree of subjectivity to this stuff. Sometimes individual preferences break through what someone's been told they *should* think; on top of that, Dimitri has known you for a really long time, hasn't he? Almost half your lives. So for all that time his culture was telling him to see your features as "other", his seeing you every day, knowing you personally, could have combatted that.
Than it is a matter of familiarity, rather than structure?
[He supposes there is some sense to that. Dedue has been loyal, and Dimitri thus learned when they were young to see past the otherness of his features and knows that his face is not one to be frightened of. He knows that regardless of what his countrymen tell him. Lorenz is still an outlier with no solid explanation, though.]
I suppose that it matters little, however. For as long as I am in Faerghus, I will be judged based on their standards, even if it is not fair to do so. I should not anticipate anything else.
[...He doesn't know about how Dedue phrased that.]
It's both.
I see what you mean there - but it could be good for you, all the same, to bear in mind that those standards aren't objective. That Faerghus saying one thing about you doesn't mean it's true.
Besides, now you're not *in* Faerghus. Do you think you could try and adjust how you look at this stuff while you're here?
[Big ask, Grant, but he'll at least try to remember that most people wouldn't look at him and see a man who's kin to regicides.]
I am, at least, glad to know that I may not be so frightening to people here as I was in Faerghus. I did not enjoy children's reactions to me, nor their parents' reprisals, but I had few ways to ease their fears.
Yeah, I get that. I imagine it wasn't near as bad on my end as yours, but having people treat you like a threat just based on how you look, and knowing there's no way to reassure them, just... really sucks. But people here definitely seem better about that.
Wow yeah uh. That having happened to begin with is intensely and deeply fucked up? Jesus, honestly fuck that place. I'm *really* glad you're getting a break from that garbage here.
Yes. Though I suppose I should note that I experienced less open hostility than the rest of my people. While I was with His Highness, they could not be actively violent towards me without it being construed as an attack on their prince. The Dusci people living in Fhirdiad had no such protections.
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If it will satisfy your curiosity, I have mostly been described as frightening, brutish, or cold. One of my classmates told me that though she was not frightened of me, she found my features to be aggressive. Children have cried upon seeing me. Mothers clutch their children when I walk by.
[So, y'know. There's that.]
I understand that the prejudices of the Faerghan people do me no favors in this arena, but all instances of someone finding me frightening cannot be contributed entirely to just that.
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But also, genuinely, every example you've given here just... sounds to me like racism. Whether the speaker knew it or not. I mean, calling your appearance shit like "brutish" and "aggressive" is INCREDIBLY loaded; white people are constantly drawing associations like that between people of color's features and whatever garbage they want to associate with us. They decide we're lesser, and then they decide that our physical features are somehow *visual evidence* of that inferiority. Even if they're not acting out of deliberate malice, a Faerghan declaring your features unattractive or scary is never going to be a culturally neutral statement
Sorry, I didn't mean to type that much.
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It is true that many spoke to me with deliberate malice. Some are merely ignorant, and while their ignorance is contemptible, I understand why they cling to their prejudices. The death of their king threw their lives into disarray. My people are easy culprits. The people of Faerghus wished to see a villain in our faces, and they have found what they sought.
However, even disregarding the prejudice against me in Faerghus, I do not possess features that are considered beautiful even outside of the Kingdom.
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[Excuse him while he gears up to refute some things.]
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Height is also attractive, in particular to Faerghans, though only until you start striking your head off of door frames.
My features are too coarse and my body built on too large of a scale to be generally attractive.
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There's an issue we talk about in my world involving "Eurocentric" beauty standards - ideas of what is attractive or appealing that are based on European/white features and cultural standards, and treat those standards as the default, or "normal" idea of what is attractive.
All this to say, I suspect Fodlan has much the same problem. Even outside of Faerghus, outside of the issue of more overt forms of racism, most people there will have learned a very specific standard for what is "attractive". They may consider features "coarse" that people outside Fodlan - and a handful of those within the continent whose standards aren't quite so steeped in the cultural hegemony - would see as sturdy and well-defined.
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It is still strange, though, to think that my features are not so unpleasant as I have been led to believe. It is also difficult to argue with what has been posted openly in a public forum. The praise is effusive.
[Definitely not just being kind and trying to console him that his face really isn't that scary. Actual praise as though he should have been able to look into a mirror all this time and know that the face looking back at him is somehow... handsome?]
Though if what you have said is true, is it not strange that Lorenz and His Highness share that opinion? They would have both been raised to view faces like mine as unattractive, His Highness in particular.
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Oh, yeah, it's bound to take some getting used to when you're new to being told that - but you're right, the praise *is* effusive, and it *should* be difficult to argue with, because it's true. :)
Depends. It could be called "strange" in the sense of being unusual, sure - but there's always a degree of subjectivity to this stuff. Sometimes individual preferences break through what someone's been told they *should* think; on top of that, Dimitri has known you for a really long time, hasn't he? Almost half your lives. So for all that time his culture was telling him to see your features as "other", his seeing you every day, knowing you personally, could have combatted that.
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[He supposes there is some sense to that. Dedue has been loyal, and Dimitri thus learned when they were young to see past the otherness of his features and knows that his face is not one to be frightened of. He knows that regardless of what his countrymen tell him. Lorenz is still an outlier with no solid explanation, though.]
I suppose that it matters little, however. For as long as I am in Faerghus, I will be judged based on their standards, even if it is not fair to do so. I should not anticipate anything else.
[So, y'know. What he'd been doing.]
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It's both.
I see what you mean there - but it could be good for you, all the same, to bear in mind that those standards aren't objective. That Faerghus saying one thing about you doesn't mean it's true.
Besides, now you're not *in* Faerghus. Do you think you could try and adjust how you look at this stuff while you're here?
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[Big ask, Grant, but he'll at least try to remember that most people wouldn't look at him and see a man who's kin to regicides.]
I am, at least, glad to know that I may not be so frightening to people here as I was in Faerghus. I did not enjoy children's reactions to me, nor their parents' reprisals, but I had few ways to ease their fears.
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[Somehow, the more people learn about Faerghus, the more reasons they have to not go to Faerghus.]
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Wow yeah uh. That having happened to begin with is intensely and deeply fucked up? Jesus, honestly fuck that place. I'm *really* glad you're getting a break from that garbage here.
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Doesn't make what you dealt with any less messed up. I get you though, that is absolutely horrifying.